“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” — Mark Twain
This week marks a major milestone: my 46th birthday is tomorrow! Instead of feeling a limit, I’m leaning into the wisdom of this age to face a problem I’ve been struggling with for years. That problem, as I recently discovered, is not a failure of skill, but a challenge of management—a truly life-altering realization.
There’s a critical difference between being a good coder and being a good coder with a busy life. I recently realized that my technical mind isn’t broken—it’s just overburdened. When I was younger, my mind was free to focus, but now, life feels like I’m a juggler wearing a heavy backpack. Every bill, work deadline, and worry is another rock added to the pack, slowing me down. I haven’t lost the ability to juggle technical ideas; it’s just incredibly difficult to catch complex problems when I’m hunched over and exhausted by the sheer weight of life’s responsibilities. Recognizing this cognitive load has been the key to figuring out my next steps in life.
This realization about the cognitive load hit me hard over the last two weeks. Every time I sat down to work on a technical project, my mind was running a high-speed internal checklist: Did I pay that bill? What’s the deadline for that work task? It felt impossible to focus. But this struggle led to necessary action, and I’m incredibly proud to say I dedicated energy to relieving the pressure and paid off two major bills! Seeing that weight lifted is immediate proof that when I can offload a real-world burden, I instantly create more space for my technical and creative focus.
The major lesson I took away from this is the need to stop trying to hold every single rock in my backpack and every ball in my hands at once. To truly free my technical mind, I need an external system of management. This is why I created a shared digital log. It’s not just a journal; it’s the place where I instantly drop all the mental checklists, organizational tasks, and important notes regarding things like my finances and health that are currently stealing my focus. By committing my worries and half-formed ideas to this dedicated external space, I can finally tell my brain: “You don’t need to hold onto that. It’s stored safely. You are now free to focus on the creative problem right in front of you.” This strategy is my new commitment to preserving my technical energy.
“Come to me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, because I am meek and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” — Matthew 11:28-30 (CSB)
As this post goes live on December 15th, the first day of Hanukkah, it’s a reminder that even when things feel overwhelming, we can still find light in the darkness. Here’s to the wisdom of turning 46: taking full ownership, letting go of the heavy load, finding rest for our minds, and making more space for the creativity and focus on what we need to tackle for the future.